A Seeking Heart

A woman’s ministry…why so complex, why so misguided--maybe it’s not.

What can I do for God’s kingdom?  There has to be something Great. Something Significant.  Some way. . . if only I was paying attention . .or something.  God can use my life--right, but how?  Often in church they speak about -service- about letting God use your life.  Being great by serving and such.  Where do I belong in this?  What area can I be used and be effective.  What can I possibly do anyway to show others His love and goodness.  I only have time for so much.  Much of my time is spent teaching at home.  Taking care of my family. House, etc. When will this “Exiting” time come when my life can be used for the good of the kingdom of God?

And this question had me for a long time.

Then it hit me.  My ministry IS in my home.  It is my husband.  My children.  My home.  ..and that is O.K.  And it Is important.  I can be effective.  It's enough for this season of my life.  I don’t have to go out and to “great” things...no need to establish a non profit, be a super mom who cooks cleans And makes a million selling strollers on the internet.  To write books or to. . .you know something “Big.”   Sure big things are fun.  But that might disrupt my focus anyway.

On Revive Our Hearts this week they are on a great series of motherhood...if you get a chance, try to listen to one or a few.  I think you will be thoroughly encouraged!  Click Here To Listen!  You can listen to today's or any past shows.

Have a Lovely Mother's Day!!

A Rare Occasion

A few weeks ago our family had the wonderful delight of going on a vacation.  For us it is a rare event.  But what a lot of fun!  Really I was hoping to pick my One favorite photo.  Conclusion: not exactly possible.  So these are a few of my favorites.

Sweet Logy

Love this, Tay is too Cute

A few Parkour moves for the guys...just hangin' out...haha, I know..I know, but i like my jokes:)

Who knew jumping around and acting like boys could have an official name anyway?

A little washed out...me playing with camera settings.

Love the light.

Getting ready for the waves.

Sunrise 

Boys with their Daddy

I actually was There

So Calm

A little part of our surprise vacation for the kids.  They were shocked.  We did tell them we'd take them to Disney (which was jst part of the trip) at some point.     But we didn't let them know we were going until the morning we left.  One of them said, "I really just can't trust anyone right now."  Too funny.  It was a long time coming and we were glad to be able to take them!

Essene...

Sounds pretty-hey?  It's bread.  Not sure (yet) though if it is good bread.  Mostly cause I have, this far been unsuccessful in making it properly.
Here's the deal--about 10 years ago when i first learned of this bread being one of the two "said" healthiest breads.  The other being sprouted grain-Ezekiel bread.  I searched for both..only found one.  But always in the back of my mind ~ Essene.  Recently I found out why.  It seems to be an ancient bread, one of the unleavened breads.  Not necessarily grocery store--sit in the warehouse a few months--sit on the store shelf a few weeks, type of bread.  And here it is:

Oh..wait a minute..that is me leaving it soak, well. . just a bit too long.  It sprouted!! Hmm. . maybe I will have to throw some wheat in my garden this year.  And to be honest, so far two attempts for me..the third-well hopefully will be a charm.
Why try a third time?  If made properly it is actually considered a raw bread -when cooked at 180F or lower.  Lots of benefits there.  Despite my failures at it (only soak in full water overnight..not the whole 3 days) it is quite simple.  It just sits on the counter and you rinse it a few times each day until it's ready.  Also using wheat berries in stead of ground flour, you have the option of pulling out little grasshopper parts that you find.  Do you really think they are doing it at the flour mill?  No wait, factory!  Grasshoppers like wheat:).
To make Essene:
Two cups wheat berries cover in water over night. Over the next three days keep well drained and rinse three times daily.  When you see a small white sprout about the size of the wheat grain it is ready.  Throw it in the food processor, form in a pan and throw it in the oven @180F for 6-8hours.  Or: Here are two recipes, the first does a good explanation to not rot the berries -like I did- the second looks like more fun.  Recipe A Recipe B

So I will be trying again.  I'll have to share if it goes well.

SO Obvious-but So Excepted

Here is THE question:  Would You wear your bra and underwear (with a pair of flip-flops)  to your local supermarket?  Or a movie theater?  No?…how about just for a walk around the block then. . .?

Would you let your daughter?

Then why is it so widely accepted for everyone, big, little, young - old, atheistic or Christian to wear a bikini, not to mention the decreasing size of them--out in the open.  You know. . . as long as  a pool or beach are near by.  Or a sprinkler.  Maybe...just the sun.   Well there is the volleyball net too.  I'm saying this is one of the most obvious things ever but somehow accepted just because it is called a swim suit,  oh yea, and, like made of nylon and spandex or something, instead of oh wait... nylon and spandex.  Perhaps the percentages are different then.

Scary question for me to ask, because it is an unpopular thought.  But many of my thoughts are.  And you will notice that I snuck this in Before swimsuit time so no one can think I am personally accusing them.  I shake my finger at no one (except myself!). See I do have a bit of smart.

But truly why as a society is this so widely ok?  It is not ok.  It’s bad enough having adult women walking around nearly naked, but add to it little girls, pre-teens . Seemingly everybody.  Now I will say just a few years ago I too wore one too-cause its ok-right?  That’s what I learned.  And besides if everyone else has one don’t I need to give my husband something to look at??  No ~ that is- Not in public;)  I am for his eyes, I will preserve myself for his eyes.  He is the only man whose eyes I want to please.  And I will choose to do that not in the open.  Unless we are stranded on some sandy tropical beach--then I definitely will.

Modesty -OH shoot did I actually say that word.  What a terrible word.  Seriously when did modesty become so obscure.  I choose to continue to learn it, and teach it to my daughter.  Speaking of daughter, my hope is that she finds (in a few years) a lovely young man who will love her for who she is, for her personality first…the rest is just a bonus.  But if all the -goodies- are hanging out how will any young man be able to pay attention to her words and personality?

I will say no to the bikini.  Will you join me?

The Joys!

I won’t lie, home schooling can be quite difficult at times so it is necessary to delight in the plain goofy.  Just a few short stories of :“Things That I Never Would Have Witnessed If I Didn’t Home school”  Unnecessarily long title. . . I know!

Just earlier this week: I had the pleasure of checking over my boy’s work, to find on THREE of his blanks for a science work sheet --with this filled in:  IDK -- IDK -- IDK.   To make it even more fun ~ that was three out of only five questions total for that day!

Or this, going about the normal day.  If any day is normal.  Kids are taking their lunch break.  What is in my hair???  A Lego?!  Really-a Lego.  Not just in my hair.  Specifically Tied in my hair.  Of course I had to ask about it; it was from Kaleb--and--it had been in for a few hours.  Hmm...

Logy, newly attached to a stuffed animal.  Found in the basement - used to be his sisters.  Now it is his precious animal.  Carries it around the house.  Makes us all kiss it.  Sometimes he needs to be wrapped in his blanket.  And if you squish its belly it makes noise too!  Except, now it’s old.  So to make the noise, you have to punch it. . .quite generously.  Logy let me know "Puppy" -cause that’s its name-has a birthday in 2 days.  Then asks very seriously, “What will you get him for his birthday?”  I reply. .”Cookies.” thinking--sure, I can deliver on that if I must.  He then replies, “Me and Puppy. . .share everything.”   He repeated this same questioning to other members of the family as well.

It is so easy to dwell on the difficulties of life.  But it is much more beneficial to spend more time being thankful, and dwelling on the Joys.

Our Family

by Taylor

Punishment vs. Discipline

Seriously!!  There is a difference?!  (That is my thought process as I learn.  I love new ideas and learning new things!) Yes.  I, -only-Recently learned this distinction.  This  is one of the 2 very important things I have learned as a parent regarding discipline.  

 First, punishment or discipline?  I never thought of the two as different.  Never really processed that .  But what a world of difference!  Reading, in a book Choose Words Choose Life, I discovered punishment is simply “stopping a behavior.”  Discipline is different in that it Teaches children how to live.  Basically you can punish a child.  Stop the behavior.  Go on with life.  And this pattern is repeated rather often.  But in doing so you can miss an opportunity -to teach-.   Why should they stop?  Cause mom or dad said so?  Well, yes but as a parent am I the end of the line?  Am I the moral authority or standard?  Um. . .not really.  Not at all.  I just am a copier (and often “attempted copier“), of the Bible.   So I’m learning to use that (the Bible) in directly teaching at each opportunity they give.  Which can be often:)  But my goal is to instill values  regularly -even daily as I become more accustomed to this new pattern that I’ve been blessed to learn of.  Not to say I never did this, yes sure there were times.   But repetition is the mother of all learning.  And we all know for a child -ehhahemm..even ourselves-learning is:  repeat -- mistake --relearn --repeat--etc.  To make this a habit, to turn the inconvenience of disobedience into an opportunity!  What a great opportunity.  No longer will I pass it up.

The second, is the idea of breaking or rather shaping the will and not breaking the spirit.  The spirit of a child is fragile & easily broken.  The will is very strong.  Breaking the spirit happens when punishment comes out of anger, frustration, just reaching the proverbial “end of the rope.”  The -rough- “PUT IT DOWN!” Yank (it) out of the child’s hand with harshness and pure frustration…maybe even a glare in your eye,  “WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH YOU.”  Anything demeaning.  Harsh.  Unnecessary for teaching them.  Instead of the -difficult-self controlled, calm, but serious, “you need to set that down-now-.”  Elementary example-but I think it simplistically reaches the point.  What we really want to give our children is the shaping of the will, keeping their spirit healthy. Click here and scroll down for a more detailed description.

Insist to Persist

IT was Friday.  IT felt like Monday.  So--I had to put it on a Monday cause the feelings were just too draggy for a Friday.  Ever have those days you wonder why you do--what you do?  For me, an at home mom. Teacher to my kids.  This job has no glory.  No esteem. . .at least not on this earth.  No “ladders” to climb and get “bigger.”  Nonetheless it’s my job.  And it’s what I’m called to do.  Here is the thing--I think many at home moms struggle with: The Dream, the Co-Workers & the companionship -that goes with it. Importance. A pay check.  Communicating with people. . .regularly - -that are your own age.  Getting out of the house (often).

 Cause you know us at home moms are in gray sweats all day with long oily bedraggled hair down to our waists, bare feet (oh that’s rough in the winter), excepting when we go out, then the bonnet goes on!  OH YEA!  Haha.  You get the picture..the stigma shall I call it.

So at times the inward struggle happens.  Especially on the days that you are just trying to keep the patience.  Trying not to freak out.  Burst.  Cause the precious littles can have those days when they yank and tug and pull -the patience- all day:

 “Just do what I told you.”
  “If you would have been focusing that would have taken you ½ the time  (in an undertone). . . At most!”       “You mess up your bed every day what makes you think that you don’t have to make it today?”

 And on. And on.  You get the picture.  These days are inevitable.  So that was my Friday, just "keeping it together."  Just hanging by a thread.  Just trying to say a little prayer here and there in desperation…try to keep -the patience-.

But I will not give up.  Won’t give in.  This is what I am supposed to do in my life.  God will give the strength.  All I need for that day is to persevere.  No need to consider “a real job,” no need to consider “wow, the extra money would be nice…oh maybe work just enough to cover the grocery bill.”  No  need to think, “the time away from home, the friends …the adventure.”  Life with kids is an adventure!  I will never look back and say wow wish I spent less time with my kids.  Being home is valuable, it is good, it is worth it.  Glory or recognition for it won't come in this world.  But who needs it anyway!  My heart and mind are at peace where I’m at.   Even though some days the peace is waaay deeeep inside :).  It is good.  Life is good.  Someday I will have more time to spend with friends.  More time for what I want to accomplish.  Not today.  Thankful for the ones I have.  And thankful for my Job.   My kids.  My husband.
Be encouraged.  Be thankful.  Some days are just tough.  Sometimes a lot of days are tough.  Life is full of ups and downs, we ride the roller coaster…even though sometimes it makes us sick.  Stick-to-it-ive-ness is at a loss in our culture today.  Possibly -near extinction.  Though it remains a very good thing.   In all the ups and downs there is one truth that is constant, one thing that always stays the same.  God’s word-it is dependable.  At times the only thing we Can count on.

  For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.  Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

Hebrews 4:12-13